O What A Story - A Blessing Came Anyway

I occasionally wonder why I don't lay more burdens at God's feet and walk away. It seems that when I actually do that, the burden is always lifted, and I always get a return blessing. That was the case this weekend.

For weeks I have been on a "worry tear" about my solo in this year's church Christmas celebration. I have been given many solos over the years and never thought much about most of them. I just try to convey the song's message in the most meaningful way I can. I have always realized that my voice is not mine, but God's, and He will do all the singing if only I will get out of His way. Unfortunately, I might have forgotten that recently, although I don't think without a little merit. When the songs were assigned, I truly was flabbergasted. I didn't receive just ANY song. It was THE song, and not just THE song, but the most quintessential Christmas song of all...O Holy Night.

O Holy Night, is not an easy song to sing. It has an odd timing, and it's not very melodic; however, it has a very powerful message. This particular arrangement was one that was a true stretch of my vocal range. I was petrified from the start - a position with which I am not normally familiar. I stewed about it for weeks; asked advice from trained vocalists on tips to sing it correctly; and joked about how in the world I was going to handle the final measures of the song. I must have listened to that song in my car everyday going to and from work, and all day on the computer while I was at work. It still unnerved me.

I wanted so desperately to get it right, but what I didn't do is really give it to the Lord. Finally, right before I took the microphone on the first night, I did just that. I prayed - "Lord, not my voice, but yours; not me but you; not my message, but yours; please sing this for me." Then, a strange thing happened. I stood in center stage and felt the most amazing rush from my feet to my head! I nearly cried. It was almost as if the Lord said - "OK, just back off. It's my turn." I was completely at peace, but I didn't remember where we were in the music! That may explain why I came in 4 measures to early!!

What happened after that was nothing short of a "God Thing." The other 2 performances went off virtually without a hitch. I hit and sustained notes I never thought I could. It seemed almost easy. I didn't feel strained or tired. I truly didn't feel like I had done anything; however, I was strangely emotional. The last night, I could no longer hold back emotion. It was so overwhelming to me - what God had done. He had taken this enormous song and fit it to my small voice, and then He sang it through me! I just couldn't hold back tears any longer. I knew that my Heavenly Father had done it again.

I was very much aware that God had drawn His people closer to Him through all the music during those nights. I heard it in the voices of the people who were so moved by what we accomplished. They knew that God was there, and that He loved them. They knew it because He manifested Himself through all of us in verse and song.

I was also very much aware of the fact that he was granting me a 2-fold blessing. I was privileged to receive an ovation for my performance. I didn't even know I received an ovation the first night! I was told after the fact. God allowed me to see that people appreciated the talent that He bestowed upon me. In addition, He allowed me to see the blessing it gave to others. Praise the Lord, children were saved! I had people pray with me, tell me how that song was just what they needed to hear, and just weep that God had spoken to them through that song. It was incredibly humbling to be a part of something that was totally orchestrated by God, Himself. What do you say when you truly know that it wasn't you, but God. An amazed 'thank you' is all I could think of to say.

I am always amazed at the way that God showers us with blessings when we aren't looking for one. It wasn't about me or what I could do or how well I could sing. It wasn't about our choir and how much we'd rehearsed or how well we'd sung. It was all about God and how He chose to work through His servants and bless His people. I believe He did that this weekend with our choir. God reminded me and all of us just what Christmas is all about.

Let every voice sing and rejoice;
for God so loved the world... O What A Story!